I loved every sentence of this. I smiled over "We have had exactly 100 fights." And read this part twice because it was so damned delightful - “You look good. You still have that confidence. So would I if I looked like a knife in a cool combination of charcoal colored clothes. You have the hair, and the figure, and the glasses.” He said, “I think we look the same.” This is an example of how love distorts.
Thanks! We love the readers of the stack. R is not only a character, he is very helpy as well, and he co-pilots the Zooms, adding many R Toon ideas and encouragement to writers. xxL
I love this entry so very much. SO MUCH. These are my two favorite parts: "A fight is not about what it’s about. It never is. A fight is a boulder that has sat patiently for 10,000 years on the side of a mountain and suddenly decides to move twenty yards. Who even knew it was alive?" and "At 17, when I left for college, wherever I lived from then on I built a nest. Even at an artist residency, in a room I would use only for a few weeks or a few months, I moved the furniture, pinned up art, made arrangements of things I found. It was so I could look around, breathe, and begin to think." You have described me exactly. I thank you for your talent and your insight.
Thanks so much, Janet. It's super helpful to know which pieces bring pleasure and the reasons they do. xxL PS Would you like to come to the next Zoom conversation to talk about how a piece like this gets written?
Amazing, immersive writing, as always. The last paragraph was particularly moving: “In thirty years, Richard and I will be birds that nest in the little port holes on the underside of our giant solar unit. Birds that are undisturbed by the motion of the unit as it follows the sun and at night flattens out and comes to rest. These birds have learned to take the ride every day. I will be saying to Richard, ‘Sure, order the most expensive kit there is to test the water. I don’t care how much it costs.’ I will not be saying this with irony. Then, as now, I will want him to be happy.”
This piece of writing encouraged me to become a paid subscriber. You describe life with another so well, your choice of language and details so moving. Thank-you for this beautiful piece of writing about every day life. My partner and I are starting a kitchen renovation (not by choice, there was water damage from rats chewing in pipes in our kitchen ceiling and the kitchen is 30 years old anyway) - and I feel like our conversations with the contractor/builder are similar, except I am going with Ikea cabinets, not beauty because of cost :)
In my experience as an architect, these arguments are the necessary fuel for a better project. I worry when clients *don't* argue. I admire your suspicion of "maintenance-free" materials. Trex is evil - can't be recycled, can't be composted. One of my mentors called it a "monstrous hybrid." I love how a big of animacy snuck into the way you write about houses. They do feel alive.
I'm writing about shelter for May's "Talking Back to Walden," so of course every post I've read today has something about houses or shelter in it. Good luck with your renovations.
I just read your article in the Paris Review! Congratulations. It’s wonderful. I didn’t know how to comment on it there so I just wanted to say something somewhere! You are so badass
Thanks so much. There doesn’t seem to be a way to comment there. Please come to a Zoom conversation if you like. The next one is May 25 from 3 to 4. The details are on this post. Cheers, L
What all couples should read before moving in together, but of course they wouldn't believe it. "Never mind what the fights are about. A fight is not about what it’s about. It never is. A fight is a boulder that has sat patiently for 10,000 years on the side of a mountain and suddenly decides to move twenty yards."
ha, i laughed out loud at "this is an example of how love distorts." and i loved your last line: "then, as now, i will want him to be happy." that real wood deck is going to look so great! yes, beauty alone is reason enough.
What I love about this piece - and so many others - is how you talk about Richard. It is so clear, always, how much you fancy him! And it's delightful the he "looks like a knife" in varying shades of charcoal. Who wouldn't want to hear THAT. And I relate hugely to the whole Reno thang as I have been there, done that, a few times and somehow survived. It's crazy-making how rapidly one can descend into fierce altercations about paint colours like "Linen" "Almond" or "Bone ...." Usually, I have to step away - in stony silence - but I also hate myself for even caring sometimes. Great post!
For less than a cup of Starbucks the pleasure of a good read. It’s a bargain Laurie. I need to start my day with a wry smile. I think of the houses and apts. I have lived in over a life time. If I were to describe them as you describe yourselves, your bodies houses having the it own unique characteristics it would be a funny sentimental read with more than a touch of nostalgia.
I loved every sentence of this. I smiled over "We have had exactly 100 fights." And read this part twice because it was so damned delightful - “You look good. You still have that confidence. So would I if I looked like a knife in a cool combination of charcoal colored clothes. You have the hair, and the figure, and the glasses.” He said, “I think we look the same.” This is an example of how love distorts.
Thanks for a great read. I love you and Richard.
Thanks! We love the readers of the stack. R is not only a character, he is very helpy as well, and he co-pilots the Zooms, adding many R Toon ideas and encouragement to writers. xxL
I love this entry so very much. SO MUCH. These are my two favorite parts: "A fight is not about what it’s about. It never is. A fight is a boulder that has sat patiently for 10,000 years on the side of a mountain and suddenly decides to move twenty yards. Who even knew it was alive?" and "At 17, when I left for college, wherever I lived from then on I built a nest. Even at an artist residency, in a room I would use only for a few weeks or a few months, I moved the furniture, pinned up art, made arrangements of things I found. It was so I could look around, breathe, and begin to think." You have described me exactly. I thank you for your talent and your insight.
Thanks so much, Janet. It's super helpful to know which pieces bring pleasure and the reasons they do. xxL PS Would you like to come to the next Zoom conversation to talk about how a piece like this gets written?
Amazing, immersive writing, as always. The last paragraph was particularly moving: “In thirty years, Richard and I will be birds that nest in the little port holes on the underside of our giant solar unit. Birds that are undisturbed by the motion of the unit as it follows the sun and at night flattens out and comes to rest. These birds have learned to take the ride every day. I will be saying to Richard, ‘Sure, order the most expensive kit there is to test the water. I don’t care how much it costs.’ I will not be saying this with irony. Then, as now, I will want him to be happy.”
Thanks! When you say "immersive" writing, do you mean you become immersed?
"Then, as now, I will want him to be happy." It really is all about this. You want your people to be happy.
This piece of writing encouraged me to become a paid subscriber. You describe life with another so well, your choice of language and details so moving. Thank-you for this beautiful piece of writing about every day life. My partner and I are starting a kitchen renovation (not by choice, there was water damage from rats chewing in pipes in our kitchen ceiling and the kitchen is 30 years old anyway) - and I feel like our conversations with the contractor/builder are similar, except I am going with Ikea cabinets, not beauty because of cost :)
It excites and pleases me that the post prompted you to help out. I am hugely appreciative. Good luck with the kitchen!
I don't know what a Trex deck is, but I wish ours was one.
Great writing, as usual!
It's a composite . . . plastic of some sort.
I'm not 'liking' the plastic - just acknowledging the response!
We have two Trex decks. I’m 60. No kids to leave the house to. I have no excuse.
You'll see ours when you come! xxL
In my experience as an architect, these arguments are the necessary fuel for a better project. I worry when clients *don't* argue. I admire your suspicion of "maintenance-free" materials. Trex is evil - can't be recycled, can't be composted. One of my mentors called it a "monstrous hybrid." I love how a big of animacy snuck into the way you write about houses. They do feel alive.
I'm writing about shelter for May's "Talking Back to Walden," so of course every post I've read today has something about houses or shelter in it. Good luck with your renovations.
Thanks!
I just read your article in the Paris Review! Congratulations. It’s wonderful. I didn’t know how to comment on it there so I just wanted to say something somewhere! You are so badass
Thanks so much. There doesn’t seem to be a way to comment there. Please come to a Zoom conversation if you like. The next one is May 25 from 3 to 4. The details are on this post. Cheers, L
What all couples should read before moving in together, but of course they wouldn't believe it. "Never mind what the fights are about. A fight is not about what it’s about. It never is. A fight is a boulder that has sat patiently for 10,000 years on the side of a mountain and suddenly decides to move twenty yards."
ha, i laughed out loud at "this is an example of how love distorts." and i loved your last line: "then, as now, i will want him to be happy." that real wood deck is going to look so great! yes, beauty alone is reason enough.
Come back to see the new deck! Etc. ❤️
What I love about this piece - and so many others - is how you talk about Richard. It is so clear, always, how much you fancy him! And it's delightful the he "looks like a knife" in varying shades of charcoal. Who wouldn't want to hear THAT. And I relate hugely to the whole Reno thang as I have been there, done that, a few times and somehow survived. It's crazy-making how rapidly one can descend into fierce altercations about paint colours like "Linen" "Almond" or "Bone ...." Usually, I have to step away - in stony silence - but I also hate myself for even caring sometimes. Great post!
I love you for caring. Color is beauty.
For less than a cup of Starbucks the pleasure of a good read. It’s a bargain Laurie. I need to start my day with a wry smile. I think of the houses and apts. I have lived in over a life time. If I were to describe them as you describe yourselves, your bodies houses having the it own unique characteristics it would be a funny sentimental read with more than a touch of nostalgia.
Thanks for being a paid subscriber, and many thanks for reminding people the cost is low!
No more than you deserve. Believe me I look forward to starting my creative day with like minded, well written and thoughtful conversation. It’s rare
Ah, home reno...stories for days.Hey, even if the materials last for twenty, it will all be worth it!
fabulous read!!
So happy to hear! xxL
The things that last forever are the things that are killing us.
I promise that if Richard and I last forever, we will fix that glitch.